Don't Be Afraid to Take Chances

I was having a conversation with a co-worker of mine this morning, as we were coming from breakfast, about our job and she was telling me that she hated that she didn't get a chance to sign up for the "fun committee" this year.  I asked what that was, and she told me that it was a committee that planned and organized all of the fun activities that we have at work.  And immediately I had an idea, that she would be a great event planner.  She's very bubbly, and fun, and she has a very colorful personality, and she loves to do creative things like that, so I expressed this to her, that she should look into doing it.  But she wasn't very enthused about seriously considering it as a business, another career, or even as a hobby.  Her setback was that she was afraid.

Now, this woman is about 5'11, if not over 6 feet tall, very outgoing, and meets no stranger.  And she was afraid of venturing out to do something that she is great at.  She could be missing her calling, her purpose in life, because she's too afraid to take a chance.

Often times, we let fear keep us from our destiny; the fear of the unknown and fear of failure.  But God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7).  God doesn't want us to have fear in our hearts, because fear is just a trick of the enemy to keep us from carrying out what God wants us to do.

Do you know what FEAR stands for?  False Evidence Appearing Real.  That's it. 

Many of us miss out on our blessings because we are afraid of failing, but failure is a good thing.  I know you're probably asking yourself, why?  Well, failure makes us stronger, failure is a guide, and failure is a great teacher. 

Going through trials and making mistakes is a part of life, that you can't get around, unless you do absolutely nothing for the entirety of your life.  How you respond to failure is what will help you in your quest to find your true purpose in life.  If you're smart, you'll learn from your past mistakes, gaining knowledge on what to do or not to do if faced with the situation again; therefore, making decisions based on past experience, that guide you down paths leading to your destiny.

I've always been a pretty adventurous person.  I love to try new things, and even though I may be a little apprehensive sometimes, I'll still do it, just to see where it will take me.  Especially, if I develop an interest in something or someone, I can't rest until I try it out, and if it doesn't work out, I just move on to the next project, maybe that wasn't for me. 

So don't be afraid to try things, if you want that job, go get it, it doesn't matter if you're the least qualified.  The favor of God upon you is all you need.  God said, "the last shall be first and the first shall be last (Matt 20:16).  Favor is when God blesses you with something that you didn't deserve upon any doing of your own, but He blesses you with it anyway, because His favor is upon you.

I pray that this message was a blessing to you today.  Thank you for reading.  In Jesus' name, be blessed.

Believe In Yourself

I know that you've probably heard this about a million times in your lifetime, but it's true, and it works. When you believe in something, it causes you to act on what you believe, therefore producing results that line up with what you believe. For instance, if you believe that exercise is good for you and will help you to lose weight, you will begin to exercise, thus producing the results that you anticipated.

Faith works the same way. It's a muscle that has to be trained and worked out, in order for it to work for you. If you believe that you can do something, you will do it, and there is nothing that anyone can say or do to convince you otherwise.


But you might say, "I don't have what it takes," or "I just can't do it." But God says, "You shall have whatsoever you say." (Mark 11:23) You have the power to speak life or death, prosperity or destruction, good or bad, it all lies in your tongue (Proverbs 18:21).  God says that if you believe and don't doubt, you can have whatever your heart desires.


It's important that we believe in ourselves, but more importantly believe in the immeasurable power of God, who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we can ever ask or think, according to the power that works itself in us (Eph 3:20).


Stop telling yourself what you can't do, and start telling yourself what you can and will do. Even if you don't believe in God, or believe that your words have life, what you say, whether it be good or bad, will still manifest itself in your life. So speak life, not death into your situation, into your family, and into yourself.

No Matter What It Looks Like, Never Give Up

Often times I've found myself giving up on things, and somtimes even people because of what it looks like on the outside, or what it looks like right now.  Or maybe not giving up on them, but just setting them aside for now, because it was too hard or taking too long.  I have mentioned before that I am a very, very impatient individual.  I want things when I want them, which is usually right now.

But I've realized that life doesn't quite work that way.  Some things can be obtainable right now, but some things take time.  I'm also learning that good things come to those who wait, and special orders take time.  See, when I get it in my head that I want something, it's always a certain way that I want it.  I'm very particular, and very detailed about things.  So I must understand, that in order to get what I want, the way that I want it, it's going to take time.

Maybe there's something that I need to do first, before God will give it to me or reveal it to me.  Maybe I need to mature more, or get to a certain place, emotionally, physically, mentally, and/or spiritually, like Abram in Genesis Chapter 13.  We don't know God's plans for our lives, but He does.  That's why He instructs us to seek Him with all our hearts, because He knows His thoughts toward us; they are of peace, to give us an expected end (Jeremiah 29:11-13). 

We can't just look at a situation or an obstacle and want to run away from it, because we may never reach our blessing.  And you're going to face it over and over again until you overcome it. 

When Joseph was sold into slavery by his own brothers, they meant it for evil, but God meant it for good.  When you know that you have God in your corner, you can look at the glass half full, not half empty.  Because whatever the devil tries to put in front of you to stop you from reaching your destiny, your God given purpose in life, God is the one who has full control, and can turn it completely around to work in your favor, but you have to give Him that control first.

Never let what a situation looks like stop you from going after your dreams, your passion, your purpose in life.  Try and try again, and again, and again.  God said that He would not cut off our expectations (Proverbs 23:18), and our God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should change His mind (Numbers 23:19).

Don't Let Your Vision Die

This title came to me when I was listening to a sermon on the radio this morning, on my way to work.  The Pastor was preaching about Christian parenting and he was talking about how God wants us as Christians to teach our children to be Godly.  I than began to think of how this was my vision for my family before my husband and I got married.  However, that is not how it has turned out to be, and along the way, my husband and I both have lost sight of what we were called to do.  With all of the obstacles that he and I have faced, my vision of being a Godly wife and mother, and teaching my children the way of the LORD, had started to whither away.

And I realized that I am letting my vision die.

Once you start to lose sight of something, it becomes an out of sight, out of mind situation.  Then your actions are no longer in line with what you orginally set out to do.  No matter how long it takes, how hard it is, how far away it is, or how much effort you have to put forth, you should never let anything detour you from your mission.

Even in trying to discover my purpose and calling, I lost sight of what my first calling is now, and that's to be a wife and a mother.  To love and honor my husband, and train my children in the way that they should go.  The enemy had me so distracted, that I had forgotten about this.  Well, not forgotten, because it's embedded in my heart, but it became less and less important to me, the more I stacked other things at the top of my life's to-do list.

Noone should ever seek their purpose, without seeking the purpose of God first.  I will be the first to admit, that I am guilty of this, and I knew better.  But I've always been stubborn, and God knew that.  So He let me run around in circles trying to "find myself", because He knew I'd be back eventually.  God does have a sense of humor.

 I believe this is why I've been so lost and unfulfilled.  Because I had begun to let my vision deteriorate.  Before my husband and I got married, all I wanted was for the LORD to use us; to make us an example for other couples; to use us to glorify His name.  But when the crap started to hit the fan, all I wanted to do was run.  I forgot all about what I had asked God to do, and the passion I had for family, because this just could not have been in God's plans.  There must have been some sort of mistake.  He couldn't have possibly meant for me to endure so much in so little time.  I was starting to feel like Job; like I was being tested at every angle, but unlike Job I was failing every test.  I never blamed God, but I had a hard time seeing the glory in any of it.  But I do have hope in this: after Job went through his test, God blessed him 2 times over.

That's why I have decided to breathe new life into my dream of having a family that will glorify God.  I have to get back to putting God first and inviting Him into everything I do.  Like I get so often because I'm very impatient, I got tired of waiting on the LORD and I tried to go off on my own without God, but I'm a great example that that never works.  You will only get so far.  And nothing is more important than me and my family being able to enter into the Kingdom of God when that time comes. 

Enjoy the Journey

So for the longest time, I let the fact that I was not doing, or even pursuing my true purpose in life, bother me.  So much, that I had forgotten to take time out to enjoy life.   Everything we go through in life, that leads up to where we finally end up, is what makes us who we are.  The trials, the mistakes, the lessons learned, the laughs, the cries, the heartbreaks, and the joyful moments, all shape and mold our character.

I was so fixated on finding my destiny, that I was missing the beautiful scenery around me on the way. 

Recently, I went on a Western Caribbean Cruise with my mom, sister and aunt, and I couldn't be more happier that I went.  I wasn't going to go, because I didn't want to leave my husband and kids behind, and I didn't want to miss a whole week of work, but I decided to go anyway, and I am so glad that I did.  I needed that break and the relaxation that I got while away from my everyday life.

I was so busy being a wife, mother, provider, student, and trying to find myself that I was losing myself.  That trip was what I needed to refesh and get back in the game.  Had I not gone, I'd probably still be just as confused and frustrated as I was before, if not more.

So don't forget to "stop and smell the roses", on your journey to finding your purpose, because what you're looking for might be hidden in the bushes.

While on the cruise, we took many, many pictures, because my sister is a picture freak.  All of the professional cruise pics that were taken on the ship of me, came out beautifully, and most of the ones that we took on our own.  My aunt pointed out that when we got back home that I should look into Plus Size Modeling.  This is something that I had planned to do in the near future, but after dropping some pounds, just for my own comfort.    I'm very photogenic, and I always have been, even when I'm not feeling well I take awesome photos, professionally and for fun.

I love taking pictures and posing, and seeing the beautiful outcome, and you already know I love fashion, so this is something that I could see myself doing on a daily basis, and being completely happy doing it. 

I will definitely look more into this now that someone else has pointed out my aptitude for being photographed.  I've had someone mention it to me when I was in high school, but I never seriously considered modeling until adulthood. 

See what I mean, by stopping and smelling the roses, what you're looking for could be right under your nose. 

I love how God works.  We spend our lives trying to find things on our own, or fix things on our own, when He's holding his hand out right in our face with exactly what we need, but we're too busy going around Him to see it. 

Passion for Fashion

So since I've been on this quest to find my purpose, I have returned to my passion for fashion.  When I was a teenager, I developed a strong interest in the fashion industry.  I would sketch clothes for men and women, and I considered going to school for it.  However, I never did. 

So I've returned to my interest in fashion, and I know now that there are more things that one can do in the industry, besides designing, which is what I originally wanted to do, and I still do eventually.  But for now, I will just become a retailer of someone else's designs.

My brother and I will be going into business soon, opening our own shoe store.  I realized that I love fashion, no matter what shape it comes in.  Since I don't have the necessary tools to start making and selling my own designs, I can sell someone else's.

I love, love, love shoes, and I know many women who can relate, and will purchase from me because of the different styles that I have that noone else does.  I couldn't be happier that I get to embark on one of my passions, and if all goes well, I may find my place in the fashion world after all.

I will keep you posted on the upcoming store and website.

PASSION, PURPOSE AND LIFE

Okay, so I am a fan of the Basketball Wives shows, and currently I've been watching the 1st season of Basketball Wives LA.  On Ep. 2, the ladies go to see Imani Showalter's, life coach, Akema Johnson-Day.  Ironically, or maybe not, the topic of their discussion was Passion.  Akema said something that really hit home for me, and is something that I have been saying since I've been on this quest to find my purpose.  Her exact words were, "when you follow your passion, you discover your purpose, and success is sure to follow."

I couldn't agree more, and I know this to be true.  However, some people might ask, "what if you don't know what you're passionate about" or "what if you're passionate about many things, where do you start?"

I say, keep it simple.

I love to write, so whenever I get ideas about anything, I write them down.  Usually, my brainstorms or idea clouds include a mini-plan of how I think I can reach this goal, or how it can be obtained. Usually I do some research to support my ideas and I may or may not pursue it right then.  What determines if I do pursue them at the time or not, are timing and resources.

I ask myself, "do I have the time to put into this project," or "do I have enough money to get started," or "do I have the necessary tools, products, or equipment that I need?" 

But my first step is to always WRITE IT DOWN.  When you write things down, you can get all of your thoughts out on paper, so you can better evaluate the situation or idea, and return to it later for further review. 

To see how to organize your ideas, please read Discovering Your Purpose: Narrowing Down Your Options.

How To Determine What You Are Passionate About?

Basically, being passionate about something, means that it is of great importance to you.  It could be what get's you up in the morning, what calms you down, what gives you peace, what makes you smile, or even what makes you cry.  It could come from a strong interest in something or someone.  It also could be something that you love to do. 

Ask yourself these questions:

If you had 1 million dollars, what would you do with it?

If money nor time was not a factor, what would you be doing right now?

What makes you feel important?

What makes you happy? Smile?  Laugh?

What gives you hope?

If you could change anything about the world, what would it be?

If money, education or skills was not a factor, and you could do anything, what would you be doing right now?

If you honestly answer these questions, you will probably find that you would have answered some, if not all, of them with some of the same answers.  Those repetitive responses, are more than likely what you are passionate about.

Next, take the necessary steps to follow your passion.  Research, research, research.  Find out everything that you can about what you desire to do, and start making moves toward them.

Discovering Your Purpose: Narrowing Down Your Options

The first step to narrowing down your options of things that you want to do or can do, is to make a list.  Write down everything you've ever wanted to do, still want to do, everything you've done and maybe enjoyed doing, and what you're good at.  This is the brainstorming session.  I start with the things I love to do, then add things that I might have never done but want to do, then add the things that I know that I am good at doing.

After I've gotten it all down on paper, then I prioritize my list into what can be done in a few days to a few years or more.

The things that can be done sooner, I make a plan to get them done.  

For example:  I am planning to get my Real Estate License this year.  First, I have to take the class, which only takes about 2 months to complete.  Then, I have to take the state board exam, get my fingerprints and background check completed, and everything else that that involves; all things that I can accomplish by December of this year.  I have registered for the class, and I will take the exam upon completion.

The plan is to make your list, put in the order of what is most important or desirous to you, then put in order of what can be done the quickest or easiest, research and make a list of what each goal entails, and work your plan.  

You may end up finding your purpose with the first try, or it may take you trying a few things before you discover what you're supposed to be doing.  But it can't hurt.  You're doing things that you want to do, or enjoy doing, or are good at doing and maybe learning some new talents along the way.

The History of Me

Wow, where do I start?  I could start all the way from the beginning and give you a long drawn out biography of my life from my younger years until today, but even I wouldn't want to read through all of that.  So I'm going to try and keep it as simple as I can without skipping the major events.

To make a long story short, I was raised by both of my biological parents, both of whom were what I consider to be sort of lower middle-class citizens.  Both born and raised in Jacksonville, Fl.  I had a pretty good child hood, no major traumas or misfortunes, but I did watch my parents struggle and work very hard to take care of me and at some point, my siblings.  See, I'm the baby by at least 13 years to my 5 older siblings.  So I kind of grew up alone, for the most part.  

Since I can remember, I've always wanted to do big things, and I've always believed that I could make a difference in the world. As child I dreamed of being a veterinarian, a doctor, an architect, a lawyer, a dancer and a singer.  When I became a teenager, I wanted to be an actress, a singer, a dancer, a fashion designer, a restauranteur, and just an entrepreneur in general.

I was always an excellent student, who didn't have to do much to maintain above a B average.  After graduating high school, I went straight off to college, where life for me changed.  I never really understood what the Cosby produced show, "A Different World," meant by that title until I went to college.  It was definitely a different world.  The things that I used to do to in school that earned me A's and B's, were now only good enough for maybe a D.  I was not prepared for what I experienced, but I must say that those years were the most exciting, fun, lonely, and sad years of my life...lol.

But after 2 years, I didn't have to worry about that anymore, because I returned home to give birth to my baby boy.  Yes, I got pregnant, and now that I look back at it, coming home was probably the worst mistake I've ever made.  I was very lonely and homesick, so at the time it seemed like a good idea, but if I had known then, what I know now, I would have stayed and raised my son there.

Anyway, after returning home and having my son, I had to face the real world.  I worked and tried to go to school, while living at home with my parents.  My mom was a big help, but I just couldn't bounce back.  Soon school became harder and harder, and I found myself withdrawing from semesters left and right.  I had always wanted to go to college and graduate, so I was determined to accomplish this goal, but every time I got started, it seemed like I couldn't finish for one reason or another.  So it took me 6 years just to get my AA degree, and who knows how long it will take me to get my Bachelors or Masters, but I know that as long as I have breath, that I will accomplish this goal.

So since I've come back home, I have worked, doing everything from warehouse work to being an insurance medical underwriter, which is my current job title.  I have had a pretty good permanent position at an insurance company, that I quit to go back to school full time to get my degree and work at a gas station over night.  I have worked in the entertainment/music scene in my city with local artists, managing and assisting them.  I have done Multi-Level Marketing companies, all of which have not been successful for me.  I have tried my hand at sales, which I'm not very good at because I don't really like talking to people...lol.  Recently, I tried going to school for Cosmetology, because I really wanted to learn how to do hair and all that stuff, but I just couldn't find my place there either.  My next plan includes getting my Real Estate license by the end of the year, which seems easy enough.

In 2009, I met my husband, and we got married after knowing each other for only 6 months, 3 of which he spent in jail.  Crazy, I know.  But I felt like he was the one for me.  And there is some method to that madness.  My inspiration for jumping into this was this: my parents only dated for 3 months, before they married and they have been married for 32 years now.  So that's my justification for that.

My husband has 4 children, 3 boys and 1 girl, and I have 1, a boy.  Nevertheless, I love them all the same.  They definitely keep us young, although 2 of them are old enough to be my younger brothers, instead of my sons, but they know mama don't play.

I attempted to go to school for Alternative Medicine in 2010, because I became overly obsessed with all things natural, more about that later.  Also, I decided to go all natural and I chopped off all of my hair in November of 2010.

So here I am.  A wife, a mother, an underwriter, and what else is there?  Those are the only definite titles I hold.  I am a tryologist, I will try anything at least once.  There is so much that I want to do, that sometimes I don't know where to begin.  But, I've figured out a solution for that.  If you would like to know how you can start on your journey of discovering your purpose, please read Discovering Your Purpose: Narrowing Down Your Options.

I know I promised this post wouldn't be that long, but the more I typed, the more details I realized I was missing that needed to be shared, so that my reader would understand some of the things I talk about later.  If you have taken the time to read this entire blog, I thank you and I welcome you to comment and share your story with me as well.